Reunion and DNA Reconnection for Adoptees and Adoptive Families
A Brief Statement About This Project
We are the only legal organization focused solely on reuniting Ethiopian families separated by international adoption. We are honest. We are 4 people working our butts off to provide solid, ethical resources to adoptees and Ethiopian families who are searching and in reunion. Our 4 people are Andrea, a full-time volunteer in Kansas, and 4 professional Ethiopian social workers working in different languages. We are a legal NGO registered in the state of Kansas, USA, and Ethiopia. This is more than just ‘a job’ for us; it is our heartfelt mission to provide Ethiopian adoptees with their own history!
As a small, volunteer-run organization, we are busy. At any given time, we are working with many people at different points in their process. Occasionally an email or message is missed due to sheer volume. We ask for your patience; we are doing our best with challenging tasks. Because we stepped up to address this vital issue, we sometimes take on the emotional fallout of damage caused by adoption. However, we did not create the tragedy of adoption loss. In fact, some of us are in the same boat as many of you. We ask that you understand that we are doing our best.
Who can work with us?
We work with adoptive parents and adult adoptees. Support people are welcome with permission of the adoptee.
What information do we have on each case in the database?
The initial information we bring in from each Ethiopian family or adoptee is the basics: names, dates, contact information, brief information about the adoption, and pictures when available. We call this “intake information.” It is not the full story. Note that many Ethiopians have incorrect or incomplete data.
Do you match us up if we are in the database?
We don’t have the time to do that, and it’s not automated. Searching the database for your family is something you can do. You can search for Ethiopian families in our database whether you are in the database yourself or not.
Can I have more information on such-and-such Ethiopian family listed?
Privacy of Ethiopian families is important, and not all information we have from them is posted online. This is for the safety of mothers and families in Ethiopia. Relationships must be validated before details are shared.
Verification
Verification is necessary for those who find their family in our database. There are instances of false information provided to both sides during an adoption. We don’t want you to find out 10 years from now that your found family is the wrong one. We verify every case with documentation, photos, and DNA. This process can take a little time.
We’ve Verified Everything. What Happens Next?
Next comes an update and questions for your Ethiopian family! We deliver a letter from you with photos for your Ethiopian family. Why do we do this? It’s because your family is longing for evidence that you are alive.
While we are with your family, we’ll spend time with them. We will interview them, get their life story, family history, adoption story, family member names/ages/relationship to you, health status, economic situation, jobs, educational background, and so on. We can do DNA. We provide you with a detailed report with over 200 photos and full contact information for your family. This report is shared privately with you via Google Drive.
Culturally Informed Services
We provide you with a Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) document containing information about how to stay in contact, find an adoptee therapist, and more. In this FAQ we address potential cultural conflicts that may arise and expectations your Ethiopian family may have for you.
We also give your Ethiopian family information about what life is like in western countries. We try to share what your life may be like and explain how you may react to them after years apart, living in a different culture. We broach the dreaded money issue and more.
Follow Ups
We provide follow-up to this reunion process. Got more questions? Write them down and we will call to get answers for you. Is your Ethiopian family asking you for money and it is upsetting you? We will talk to them. Are they calling you 24/7? We can explain western phone usage expectations to them.
Costs
For ten years we have offered these services at no cost to anyone. Early on, we envisioned a “pay it forward” system where people we helped would donate to the project. Sadly, that has not happened, and we are unable to keep up with costs.
The actual cost for these database services is anywhere from $400-$800 depending on the location of the birth family. If a person were using a different service, the search cost would be much higher. Therefore, a onetime fee of $300 for adoptive parents and $150 for adoptees enables us to recoup the costs we have incurred and helps the next person who is searching. There are no fees for Ethiopian birth families. For those who want to participate in an ongoing manner, we have a private donor group.
To Conclude….
Our goal is to provide you with a solid foundation with which to begin your reunion. Swapping phone numbers without any translation or cultural support is like leaving you in the water without a floaty.
Ways You Can Support this Project
- Want to donate but can’t right now? Do a Facebook fundraiser for us. If everyone we’ve helped did a Facebook fundraiser for $100 per year, we’d be fully funded! It’s simple, just click here.
- Set up a recurring monthly donation for us! You’ll light up our lives every month! Pay it forward for the next guy and the health of the organization’s mission! Donate here. Join our Monthly Donor Group. We’d love that! Check it out here.
- Share your experience with others, give us a thumbs up! Instead of telling people “We found our family,” tell them “Beteseb Felega found our family!” Because, you know, it’s sad being left out.
- Are people asking you to help reunite them or their friends when? Support us by forwarding those cases to us so that we can provide those people with excellent services too. This keeps our social workers “in work,” which is hugely important. We cannot exist without our social workers.
We rely on community support to continue this work. The roads are rocky out there! Thanks for reading and we hope you find your family in our database!
